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My LiveJournal Sitcom
3pipeproblem And Me (NBC, 1:00): 3pipeproblem (Christopher Lee) and serialkeller (John Malkovich) raise goats. Upstairs, bellatricks (Kate Hudson) likes english muffins, but moomookrymoo (Mike Myers) thinks they're disgusting. That night, beechball (Pierce Brosnan) gets bathsweaver (Famke Janssen) drunk. At the same time, meloni (Isabella Rossellini) overhears tryogeru (Lara Flynn Boyle) talking about chess. That weekend, settiai (Max von Sydow) keeps accidentally stepping on thegamesafoot (River Phoenix)'s foot. Hilarity ensues.
What's Your LiveJournal Sitcom? (by rfreebern)

It's not prime time?!?! This is gold! I should write the pilot for that contest!

God, why Christopher Lee? Why can't I be played by Christopher Walken? Or, even better, Christopher Meloni?

moomookrymoo would think English muffins are disgusting. But so do I, so who am I to talk?

And Kate Hudson had to be in it somewhere.

Isabella Rosellini and Lara Flynn Boyle. David Lynch, eat your heart out!

Although my favorite is Holmes. Lucky bastard gets to be played by River Phoenix. Make that River Phoenix's rotting corpse. Don't know how they'd manage that otherwise.

Er...

A Moulin Rouge/Hannibal Crossover.

*pinches self*

Still there.